Happier Hour: How to Beat Distraction, Expand your Time, and Focus on What Matters Most by Cassie Holmes

I really loved this time management book as well. I thought she gave some really good, scientifically based information. Everything she talked about was based in social science studies, most of which she conducted herself, and about what makes people happier. Very well done. Shocker: it's about relationships and not about getting stuff done. 

The Other Bennet Sister by Janice Hadlow

I really, really loved this book. It was a look at Mary Bennet as her own character, explaining why she acted the way she did during the story of Pride and Prejudice but also then what happened to her after. I loved seeing how Mary could be a well-rounded, full character and how she developed and grew over time. I really loved it. My only complaint was that it felt a little long and started to drag about 3/4 of the way through.

Tokyo Ever After by Emiko Jean

Princess Diaries set in Japan. What's not to love?

Tranquility by Tuesday: 9 Ways to Calm the Chaos and Make Time for What Matters by Laura Vanderkam

I like that Vanderkam is a mom of five kids, spread out over a wider spread of ages than our kids are. She isn't writing about time management from her white tower. She's super busy and gets how hard it is to implement things. But I really liked this book and the 9 techniques she talks about. I especially want to implement having a bedtime and doing one big adventure and one little adventure each week. 

A World of Curiosities by Louise Penny

This may have been one of my favorite ones yet. I love Armand Gamache and every mystery Louise Penny puts out. 

Surprised by Joy: The Shape of My Early Life by C. S. Lewis

I honestly found some of this book hard to follow. Lewis is clearly one of the smartest people I've ever read--he remembers almost everything he ever read and had references to every classic in Latin and Greek in every other sentence. As someone who doesn't know any classics, it was hard to catch all the references. But it was fine. Not really a memoir as you'd think by the title. 

The Golden Enclaves by Naomi Novik

This was the third book in the Scholomance series, and I think this series as a whole was brilliant. I love El and her character as this grumpy unwilling dark sorceress heroine, and I thought this book was amazing at tying together the entire series. There were several scenes where El sleeps with other characters that really bugged me and I felt were totally unnecessary for the plot--I wish those had been kept out. But the other 99% of the book was excellent and I loved the end of this trilogy. 

My Body is Not a Prayer Request by Amy Kenney

I heard about this from several different people and thought it would be a good thing to learn about. Kenney is writing about disability in the Christian religion and how we can do better to include and not try to "fix" or change the disabled members of the church. I definitely feel that I could do better with this and think this is such a good introduction to how and why.

A Grief Observed by C. S. Lewis

After reading Becoming Mrs. Lewis, I wanted to read all of the other books by Lewis that I could find. This one he wrote after Joy Davidman died, and I think this would be a great book to read while going through grief (or maybe not, depending on how you're feeling). You could really feel his anguish. 

Becoming Mrs. Lewis by Patti Callahan

I didn't know much, if anything, about C. S. Lewis's wife or their relationship before this, but it made me want to read everything Lewis wrote (although I've read a bunch of his books already). It was a cute story (but I think was too long) and I love Joy Davidman now.

The Color Purple by Alice Walker

This book had a lot of heart in it. I loved a lot of it. I thought Celie's growth as a character was the best part of the book. It was amazing what she went through and that she could still have love in her heart for people after it. 

Empire of Pain: The Secret History of the Sackler Dynasty by Patrick Radden Keefe

This was absolutely mind-blowing. Mind-blowing. I kept having to stop to tell Tommy about what I was learning from it. I still can't believe some of it. So insane. 

Passionate Marriage: Keeping Love and Intimacy Alive in Committed Relationships by David Schnarch

Dr. JFF recommended this book and talks about this author all the time in her courses. I feel like this could have been about half as long and just as effective, but there were definitely some good, interesting points that I wanted to remember. A lot of it JFF talked about too. 

A Curse So Dark and Lonely by Brigid Kemmerer

I read that this was a Beauty and the Beast rewrite, and was interested, but it didn't really grip me like I thought it would. It was fine but I wasn't tempted to read the sequels. I was confused about the love triangle thing. 

The Art of Gathering: How We Meet and Why It Matters by Priya Parker

This was really what it sounds like--a book about how to have good gatherings. But it goes into way more detail than I expected and honestly, was fairly interesting. I learned a lot of good ideas from it, although let's be honest--right now is not the stage in my life when this book will be that useful. Maybe in a few years I should read it again. 

Good Girl, Bad Blood by Holly Jackson

A great sequel to A Good Girl's Guide to Murder. Also well done, super gripping. 

A Visit from the Goon Squad by Jennifer Egan

I didn't love this one, but it did go pretty quickly. I liked a lot of the stories, even though they were all about a world I have no knowledge of or interest in. I liked the short story format, because I felt like I was able to get invested in each character really deeply for that time. 

A Place to Hang the Moon by Kate Albus

I absolutely loved this middle grade WWII novel about some children who were evacuated from London during the blitz. It was basically a The War that Saved My Life but much less depressing. I loved the whole thing. 

A Good Girl's Guide to Murder by Holly Jackson

I really liked this story, and I was actually super surprised by the resolution. I thought the author did an amazing job having Pip make reasonable choices and smart detective work, and make us think we were going through all of the discovering with her. She did the amazing job of making you suspect the villain early on, then clearing him for you mentally, before you realize at the end that it was actually him all along. I was really impressed with the mystery.

Carrie Soto Is Back by Taylor Jenkins Reid

I honestly wasn't sure I was going to like this, but since I've enjoyed all the Taylor Jenkins Reid books I've read, I went for it--and it was amazing. I loved it. She did such a good job with Carrie as a character and showing her grow and develop and become a more full person by the end. 

Hook, Line, and Sinker by Tessa Bailey

This was a cute romance, with a few raunchier scenes than I expected. The characters were great. I liked the setting of a small fishing town. 

Bomb Shelter: Time, Love, and Other Explosives by Mary Laura Philpott

I really loved this memoir in essays. She writes about parenting and worrying and time passing and loving your children, and it felt really poignant in spots. It was meaningful.

Peter and the Starcatchers by Dave Barry and Ridley Pearson

I have been wanting to read this book for like seven years and finally got to it by reading it aloud with the boys. We all really enjoyed it, but it took us months to get through. (Pregnancy and having a baby will do that to you.) Dane loved it so much he immediately plowed through the four sequels. A great read-aloud. 

Beyond the Wand: The Magic and Mayhem of Growing Up a Wizard by Tom Felton

I'll read anything Harry Potter. Tom Felton hasn't ever been my favorite HP actor, but Camille had his posters on our walls... and I like him a lot after listening to his audiobook. Kind of a light memoir considering he's my age but it was a quick fun listen.

Every Summer After by Carley Fortune

This was a cute romance, and I liked the childhood friends-to-lovers trope, but I didn't like the angst of her big secret and the reason they hadn't talked for ten years. I would have liked it better if it hadn't been for that. 

Finlay Donovan is Killing It by Elle Cosimano

This book was funny and fun but also I was annoyed by her crazy ridiculous choices. I hate it when characters cross the line into unbelievable and this book did that for me. I could have believed the main premise but I couldn't believe all her choices as she went through the process. Although I liked the ending. 

And Yet: Poems by Kate Baer

Loved these just like her other collection. Love how powerful they can be while being so short. 

The Day the World Came to Town: 9/11 in Gander, Newfoundland

I'd seen this book mentioned places for years but finally checked it out. It was a cute true story about the thousands of people who were stranded for days in this tiny hamlet in Newfoundland. It went quickly and was heartwarming about how many people helped and gave to strangers. It was also hard reading about 9/11 as a new event again.

Defy the Night by Brigid Kemmerer

I really liked this story. It was a great fantasy novel, with a great plot and characters. I also loved the romance element too. I would definitely listen to the sequel.

What Kind of Woman by Kate Baer

I freaking loved these poems. So accessible and so good and so heartbreaking. I cried while reading a few of them.

Thank You For Listening by Julia Whelan

I loved this audiobook and this story set in the audiobook recording world. Such a cute romance.

When Women Were Dragons by Kelly Barnhill

This book bugged me and also impressed me. I loved the idea of women "dragoning" and being able to get the men who were oppressing them. I want this to be a real thing--but I hated all the emphasis on the children who were essentially abandoned by this generation of women.

The Quotidian Mysteries: Laundry, Liturgy, and Women's Work

I have a lot of interest in deep thinking and writing about subjects that seem to be, by definition, shallow and meaningless and, yes, quotidian. That was the whole point of this book--finding the meaning in the quotidian, daily tasks that fill our lives (especially as women). I liked a lot of points of this book.

The Checklist Manifesto: How to Get Things Right by Atul Gawande

Atul Gawande wrote one of the most powerful books I've ever read with Being Mortal, so I was interested in this book just because he wrote it. The premise is just that something so basic as a checklist can make a huge difference in our success in doing things right, especially in the field of medicine and surgery. He had a lot of super interesting examples and research to back up his claims. 

The Lazy Genius Way and the Lazy Genius Kitchen by Kendra Adachi

I read these two e-books pretty quickly. They definitely had good tips and I liked how concrete the tips in the Lazy Genius Kitchen were--I'd go back to it just for the general recipe cooking tips. I also loved the permission these books gave me to value what I value. You can't value everything--you have to care about only one or two things (like when it comes to your house--do you want it to be well decorated or welcoming to kids and chaos) and do those well.  

The Bullet that Missed by Richard Osman

I love the Thursday Murder Club so so so much. The audiobook narrator for this series is so amazing and makes the series. I just love these characters. 

The Remains of the Day by Kazuo Ishiguro

After reading Never Let Me Go, I couldn't wait to read another of Ishiguro's books. This one was even better. Same style of not much plot, but a lot of thought, and again, I couldn't put it down. I kept wanting to read more even though there wasn't much to find out. It was just devastating to read and see what his life was like and how he felt looking back about how he had spent it. And the ending--so rough. 

Never Let Me Go by Kazuo Ishiguro

I didn't know what was going on for a while with this book, but once I figured it out, everything made so much sense. This book didn't have much plot, it was so internal and slow-moving and thoughtful, but I couldn't put it down. It was so good. It made me think and ask hard questions.

The Bodyguard by Katherine Center

I actually really loved this romance. I loved Katherine Center's other book, Things You Save In a Fire, and I thought this was so cute, with the girl being the bodyguard for the famous movie star. I loved the whole thing. 

It Ain't So Awful, Falafel by Firoozeh Dumas

After reading her memoir, I really wanted to read more of Dumas's works. This is a YA novel she wrote based off her personal experiences growing up. I think this would be a great book for kids and a great look at the 70s and the Iran Hostage Crisis.

The Cartographers by Peng Shepherd

I thought the idea of this book was so fascinating for the first third and then things got weird and I was super confused by the magic of it. I didn't love this. Plus it just didn't make sense to me. 

The Secret Lives of Church Ladies by Deesha Philyah

I wasn't sure what I was expecting but this wasn't it. I thought the stories were really good, although some of them were a little raunchy for my interest. I loved some of the themes though. Really well done.

Funny in Farsi: A Memoir of Growing Up Iranian in America by Firoozeh Dumas

This was hilarious and so well done as a group of stories about her childhood growing up as an immigrant in America. I love these types of cultural stories. 

Becoming Duchess Goldblatt by Anonymous

I had never heard of Duchess Goldblatt before this but Amanda recommended it, and I really enjoyed it. I felt like it was surprisingly deep and hopeful and nice. 

I'm Glad My Mom Died by Jeannette McCurdy

This was so painful and wrenching to listen to, because of the abuse and pain she had to go through. I hope she manages to keep improving. 

Wintering: The Power of Rest and Retreat in Difficult Times by Katherine May

This was okay, nothing too fascinating in it. I don't honestly have anything worth saying about it. 

Class Mom by Laurie Gelman

I'll be honest--I am 44 books behind on my book blog so I am going to settle for super short reviews now. 3 sentences or less until I get caught up. It's just too hard to keep up now, but I at least want to get through the year. I may have to transition to Goodreads reviewing after this year.

This was hilarious and so snarky and witty. I loved the snarkiness and anti-involvement of this mom. 

Anxious People by Fredrik Backman

I still hadn't read anything by Fredrik Backman other than A Man Called Ove, which I TOTALLY LOVED. So I'm not sure why I hadn't read any of his other stuff. But Tommy and Bethany both highly recommended this one to me, and again, it took me way too long to get to it. Once I started it, though, I loved it. It had the same really happy feel good ending to me that I loved in A Man Called Ove, where a weird, disparate community forms and people end up being better than you think they are. This story is about a bank robbery that wasn't, which then accidentally evolved into a hostage situation, and then turned out to be a group of people trying to help someone else. It's called Anxious People because you see into everyone's heads and get to understand a little bit of their problems and the way they think and what anxieties they have, and see how everyone has issues. It was super funny and sweet and heartwarming at the same time, and way better than I even expected. 

Laundry Love: Finding Joy in a Common Chore by Patric Richardson

I thought this book would be more metaphorical with more stories and "life lessons" than it ended up being--but it basically is almost completely a book about how to do laundry the right way. Haha! It was pretty short and actually full of new information that I didn't ever know about how to do the laundry. I learned a lot about better ways to do laundry and taking care of your clothes. It seemed like the best thing about this book is all of the specific tips for specific items of clothing, so I feel like this would be a good book to have if you need to look up how to remove a specific type of stain or if you need to wash something really persnickety. He basically says you should never need to dry clean anything and that you don't need to use all the fancy detergents--you can just use soap flakes! I want to try his tips and things at some other time in my life, but right now is not the time for me to overhaul our laundry routine completely with our new baby coming. But this would definitely be a good reference guide. 

Hunt, Gather, Parent: What Ancient Cultures Can Teach Us About the Lost Art of Raising Happy, Helpful Little Humans by Michaeleen Doucleff

I thought this book was absolutely fascinating about parenting in indigenous cultures. The author goes to three different indigenous cultures (Mayan, Inuit, and Hadzabe) and observes and interviews parents about how they parent and what they do differently from our WEIRD (Western, Educated, Industrialized, Rich, Democratic) parenting styles. Turns out, WEIRD parenting is really different from the way that most parents have done it for millennia--but the parenting that these indigenous cultures are doing is based off of what has worked for generations and hasn't changed as much. I thought that was one of the most compelling arguments for the book--our parenting style in WEIRD countries has only been happening for two or three generations at most, and most parenting articles and research being done in WEIRD countries is based only on WEIRD parents and kids so nothing has actually been generationally proven to work. 

It was really interesting just learning about these three different cultures and hearing about what she observed from these groups, but also super, super informative. I thought Doucleff did such a good job describing what the parents in these other cultures were doing, but then also breaking it down and giving specific, actionable items that parents could try. It was a cross between anthropological research and parenting, and I was super into it. I think I want to buy a hard copy so I can go back and reference it again because I know I will want to remember what she wrote about. I read it as an e-book on my phone but I then checked out a hard copy from the library because I wanted to read through it more thoroughly again and take better notes. 

Major ideas that I got from the book:

• Instead of just giving kids chores to do, make them involved in helping with the family as a whole. We all work together and make contributions to the family. Give them real responsibilities that are really helpful. 
• Minimize child-centered activities and toys/entertainment. Maximize their exposure to the adult world and bring them along on errands and do activities that you would want to do even without them.
• Don't force an issue is the kid is resisting a request. Don't nag and don't force. Practice encouragement. Use praise very sparingly, and when you do use it, praise an overall value like helpfulness or maturity. 
• Remember that anger towards a child is unproductive. It generates conflict, builds tension, stops communication. Every time we yell at a child, we teach them to yell, and we let them practice getting angry and yelling. When we respond with calmness, we give them a chance to practice calmness and calming down. 
• If you feel angry, stay quiet. Don't talk. Walk away until you can be calm. 
• Teach yourself to have less/no anger towards children. Change how you view their behavior and expect misbehavior. Never argue or negotiate with a child. Stop forcing them to do things and use encouragement instead. 
• Responding to tantrums: Go low-energy when they're screaming. Stand near them silently and physically support them. Touch them gently. Help the child to replace their anger with the feeling of awe by finding something beautiful to look at. Go outside. 
• Responding to everyday misbehaviors: Use the look. Calmly state the consequences of the child's actions then walk away. Ask the child a question that will get them to think ("Who's being disrespectful? Who's hitting?"). Give the misbehaving child a task/responsibility. 
• Use stories and dramas to encourage children to behave and to learn values. Tell stories from your childhood, put on a puppet show, use a monster story, use an inanimate object to help teach what to do.
• Reduce how often you instruct your child. Try to keep it to 3 commands an hour. Give the kids autonomy in certain areas/places where you can watch and only minimally interfere.
• Use T.E.A.M. parenting:
• T: Togetherness
• E: Encourage
• A: Autonomy
• M: Minimize Interference
• T.E.A.M. parenting is different from helicopter and free-range parenting because parents are in charge of macro-parenting issues, like scheduling and activities. But within those family-centered activities, the child is largely in charge of their own behavior with autonomy and minimal interference.