Braving the Wilderness by Brene Brown

I have only read one other book by Brene Brown (Daring Greatly), but I have also listened to her TED talks and I feel like I generally have a good grasp on what she is all about. This is her most recent book (I think?) and it seemed like a lot of repetition of her previous works, but also a lot of different stuff. This book seemed like it was very influenced by our current political climate, where everyone is extremely polarized and argumentative and can't get along, and Brown is trying to combat that with giving suggestions on how to communicate with people civilly and how to create real connections with people, but still being true to yourself and feeling strong in your own convictions and values.

I really liked some of the points that she made. She started off with a story about her feeling like she didn't belong as a child, and a story when she didn't make the cheerleading squad in middle school and how alone she felt, even with her family, who didn't seem very supportive when she didn't make it. That story was so heartbreaking to me, and it was really sad to think about the effects of feeling like you don't belong in your own family--and made me think a lot about parenting and how to avoid making your kids feel like that. Her four things that we should do to "brave the wilderness" and make connections with people while staying true to yourself were: 1. People are Hard to Hate Close Up. Move In. 2. Speak Truth to BS, Be Civil. 3. Hold Hands with Strangers and 4. Strong Back, Soft Front, Wild Heart. I especially liked the chapters about 1 and 3, and thought those were really applicable and appropriate. I loved her ideas about "holding hands with strangers," and the benefits of being at gatherings with people that involve strong emotions, like funerals or concerts or rallies, and how those real connections in a real-life setting bring us real joy and strength.

I feel a little bit skeptical about her obsession with "true belonging" and being true to yourself, though. Of course I think self-acceptance is so important. And I imagine I'm probably not great at it, nor are most people. It's a constant work-in-progress for everyone, I'm sure. However, I don't know that that itself is the pinnacle of everything and the only way to true happiness. Of course, everything she says is backed up with data (as she likes to talk about all the time), so I'm probably wrong. But I wonder if there's something different about coming from an LDS background and our views about commitments and covenants that makes me not want to swallow what she's saying wholeheartedly. I think you can definitely take this "being true to yourself" thing too far--because you can't just up and leave all your commitments and obligations and responsibilities just because you think it's not being true to you. Oh well. I am sure she would have a great answer for me, but I don't feel like it was really addressed in this book.

Sometimes her tone in this book bugged me. It was kind of whiny ("I don't fit in anywhere!" "You probably hate me!"). And also, although some of the information was good, I feel like this didn't necessarily need to be a stand-alone book. She probably could have squeezed this all into a TED talk. But otherwise, it was a fine book to read, and it only took about two hours. I think I am going to read her first book, Gifts of Imperfection, soon, since I heard that it was one of her best.